My baby fever has been in full swing lately. I look at Dylan and see less and less of the baby he once was and more flickers of the little boy he’s growing to be. Then I get all “aww” and think of how much fun it would be to grow our family by another baby or two*. So all weekend long I was looking forward to Sunday, the day my older sister Veronica, who is 18 weeks pregnant, had an ultrasound scheduled that would reveal her baby's gender…and the entire family was invited...YAY!
You see, pregnancy and I did not bode well. I loved the baby but nine months’ worth of constant discomfort, nausea, 50lbs+ of additional weight, doctor appointments, blood draws, and sensitive gums are hard to forget. Don’t even get me started on the 21 hours of labor that included throwing up my guts upon each contraction. On top of it, I’ve always, always, always wanted to adopt and now that we have a child, it’s hard for me to imagine growing our family by any means other than adoption. That is, until I see a pregnant lady- then I suddenly suffer from selective amnesia.
I was very lucky to share my first-timer pregnancy experience with a very close family member/friend Cheri, who was also pregnant with her first. We would get together and exchange embarrassing, funny,
borderline disgusting tales of what expecting was doing to us, and then we’d relish in the excitement of meeting the stranger we’d love more than anything in this world. Well guess what? Cheri is pregnant again! My fever? Growing steadily.
So yesterday I excitedly attended my sister’s ultrasound where I anxiously sat for 45 minutes as her little baby avoided making any appearances. So fickly this one! We left not knowing the gender or much of what we saw on the screen. (Was that a hand or its head?) And instead of curbing my craving for some good old fashion baby watching, it made my hunger for all things baby insatiable.
And like a joke you don’t understand until a day later, I finally get why so many women choose to have baby after baby in spite of difficult pregnancies, complicated deliveries, and all the responsibility that comes with bringing life into this world. Because despite all the challenges, the work, and the gray hair that ensues, it’s impossible to regret a love so real. And the infectious joy babies bring? Forget about it. And still, I have no idea where that leaves me. What I’m trying to say is, can I please babysit your babies?
*TWO babies? Uhm, that’s a pretty high grade fever.