Monday, March 24, 2014

Why I'm NOT Winning Mom of the Year

Embarrassing situations, close calls, and strange encounters are completely normal in life- especially with kids. I personally have my very own reel of highlights that I play in my mind when I need a good chuckle since it's not easy to laugh when the face plants, wardrobe malfunctions, or grocery store farts (Dylan did it) actually happen. Like yesterday’s moment- that is funny today

It was a completely normal Sunday afternoon. Dylan wanted to be outdoors, so we loaded him up in the stroller, leashed the dogs, and headed for the same lake we always visit on our walks. My dogs are ridiculous. One is Liebe, a 14 year old 8 lb. miniature dachshund who can hardly see or hear, and spends some of the time walking before being stowed on the bottom of the stroller. Suge is our beagle, an 8 year old weighing a lot more than he should (very fat) but can still keep up on the 3-4 mile route. In theory, we had it all figured out; water bottles, diapers, snacks, dog bags, and cell phones to track our pace. The only thing we didn’t consider? Geese. 

By the time we made it half way around the lake, my husband was pushing the stroller with an exhausted Liebe riding on the bottom. I was walking with Suge when I noticed a giant flock of geese and sitting ducks on the hillside of the lake. I thought Dylan would get a real kick out of seeing the ducks scatter, so I bolted toward the flock and began running through them as they panicked and flew all around. I turned back to watch Dylan’s reaction only to spot Liebe jumping out of the stroller and running toward the water to attack the birds. And without skipping a beat, my husband let go of the stroller and lunged after Liebe, who was a second away from jumping into the lake. And then there’s Dylan, two feet away from my husband in a moving stroller going downhill with no one behind the wheel when BAM! The stroller tips to its side and crashes on the grass with a crying Dylan strapped in oh-so-securely. Welcome to amateur hour.

My husband ran to Dylan’s side (lol), picked him up and consoled him, as we both did our best to pretend we didn’t just traumatize him for life. Surrounding us from all angles were fellow walkers, runners, and stroller-pushing mommas looking on with shocked, concerned faces, as if they just witnessed a baby falling to the floor or something. And throughout all of the commotion all I could think was, “I can’t wait to blog about this.” Too soon? Never.