DIZMOMMY > November 2013


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November 27, 2013

Tantrums and Tacos

I have to be very careful when it comes broadcasting what a good baby Dylan is because once I acknowledge his great behavior it disbands into a black hole. Yup, yesterday was a doozy. It's as if the little monster knew that I was singing him praises and decided it was high time to throw me a curve ball. Last night I was supposed to take Dylan on a dinner date with a couple of friends but after picking him up from my mom's house it was evident that he had his own agenda consisting of pure fuss. I could blame his crap attitude on teething but that's too easy. I'm convinced I am dealing with an anti-social master manipulator of the utmost sophistication whom was dead set on playing with toys in his room.

So, what's wrong with me? Why cant I take a whiny brat baby to a restaurant? I see parents with yappy, crying kids make due all the time out in public. Those patient moms and dads are seemingly interrupted when their kin begin to throw tantrums or loudly clink their forks against the table. It is amazing how these parents are able to enjoy their meals and conversations despite the dirty looks patrons shoot their way when their children are running amok. "Kids will be kids," they casually declare. As they sit calm as a cucumber in the thick of chaos, I feverishly attempt to relax my brat with distraction, bribery or whatever clown act I can come up with when the cries start. Last Friday my husband and I found ourselves consumed with crisis control while out for dinner and left mid-meal to keep from disrupting others. Grrrr. I guess I just don't have it in me, so there will be no Taco Tuesday for mommy. 

November 26, 2013

Baby Gifs & Gratitude

I  woke up in an exceptionally great mood thanks to Dizbaby, who gave me tons of loving and a full day of high spirits yesterday. In the midst of parental duties consisting of tending to, caring for, and cleaning up after, reciprocation can get lost in translation and makes having kids feel like an eternity of unappreciated labor. But then you get a day like I had, loaded with smiles and sweetness, that puts everything in perspective and gasses you up for whatever wrench is thrown your way. Bring on the wrenches!

After putting Dylan to bed last night I was thinking about how much fun I had chasing, tickling, playing, and crawling on the floor with him. He was kissing me, hugging me, laughing up a storm and he didn't even cry when I changed his outfit (he hates putting clothes on and it doesn't help that my hands are usually cold). I really wanted to encapsulate our moments together and keep the good times rolling forever. But like Dr. Seuss says in Dylan's favorite book, "Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one. Every day, from here to there, funny things are everywhere." So here's to a plethora of baby Dylan gifs and finding the fun in each and every day. 

November 21, 2013

How To Find Out If Your Blog Has Been Plagiarized

A while back I wrote about very rude and bored people stealing content from blogs and my decision to watermark all of my photos. Though I haven't experienced the headache of plagiarism (knock on wood), I wanted to share a resource I found that helps determine if your blog has been infringed upon by a super freak.

This website, CopyScape.com, allows you to type in the url of any page you want to check for plagiarism and conducts a search on the internet for duplicative material. AMAZING! People stealing  blog content is especially scary when it's a family/personal blog so I strongly recommend you bite the bullet, type in your url and run a search. I almost broke a sweat when I checked for dizmommy.com but ignorance isn't always bliss and it is better to know now and take action.

November 20, 2013

Bubble Wrap Fixes Everything

Houston, we have a problem and it's called "independence." Apparently baby Dylan thinks he should be able to go anywhere, grab anything, taste whatever, and sit in a dirty diaper for as long as he sees fit. Well too bad bucko!  Call it naivety, but I actually thought for the first few years of life that Dylan would follow my rules and instructions regardless of his own ambitions because I am the parent and therefore I'm the one in charge here. WHAT A JOKE! My little big boy is convinced that he doesn't need anyone standing in the way of the swivel chair he's dying to climb, or the magazine he wants to tear apart and chew. The balance between letting my precious angel explore his surroundings and protecting him from every corner, penny and tumble ain't easy. It's actually a lot of...wait for it...WORK. 

Have you tried reasoning with a baby before? They are real sticklers. Nearly all of the solutions I come up with to eliminate the dangers of Dylan's quest for independence involve bubble wrapping him or the house. Unfortunately, bubbles won't do anything about his bad attitude toward diaper changes or putting on clothes. I suppose I'll do what all other parents have done throughout the history of time and get creative, stern and all parenty about building good habits that will help him expect less than complete freedom. Also known as: a short leash.

November 19, 2013

Traumatic Monday

I was sitting on the floor a couple feet away from Dylan as he pulled himself up on his trunk like he's done dozens of times before, when 286 days of accident free living suddenly ended. Dylan lost his footing and smashed his face on the edge of the trunk as he fell to the ground. By the sound of the impact I knew it was a bad fall so I immediately swooped him up and brought him close to my chest as he screamed and cried in agony. I looked at his face to assess the damage and all I saw was blood, bloody blood everywhere, pouring out of his mouth. I raced to the kitchen to get something to stop the bleeding and then checked whether his two teeth were knocked out. They weren't (thank God), but his tongue was cut. 

In a state of bloody red panic I frantically called my husband but have no idea what I said. Dylan stopped crying within a minute and after soaking my sweatshirt, his onesie and a small towel, the bleeding stopped too. His cut didn't warrant a trip to the emergency room so I sat in shock with Dylan in my lap facing me, both burnt out on adrenaline and trauma. We looked at each other and  hugged, silently agreeing that the experience was too close for comfort.

I did what any other parent would do and spent the rest of the day giving him extra loving and attention. I feel absolutely terrible that Dylan hurt himself on my watch but I'm also relieved that I was there to jump into action. He seems to be fine but I'm still a bit shaken up.....I'm sorry Dizbaby! What a Monday.

November 14, 2013

Dylan Can Wave! And Detect Bullshit.

I always feel a sense of accomplishment when Dylan learns how to do something that he's been taught so please allow me to proudly inform all readers that I officially have a waver! My little big boy not only claps when I say "yay!" but he will wave when greeted. In the big scheme of things it is a small accomplishment but to momma bear it is worthy of headlining the Zepeda family newsletter. I'm all about teaching Dizbaby new "tricks" and I regularly scout the internet for all types of ways I can encourage his development. My pursuit in topping the hand wave led me to a study from 2011 involving babies and swindling. The conclusion is that babies remember when you're a bullshitter and will avoid imitating your behavior. WHOA!

Basically the study took 60 babies between 13-16 months of age and divided them into two groups, "reliable" and "unreliable." In the reliable group, an adult acted very enthusiastically about opening a box and then gave the box to the baby only for them to find it contained a toy. The unreliable group again had an enthusiastic adult opening a box then gave it to baby whom discovered that there was absolutely nothing to be enthusiastic about because the box was empty. The babies in their respective groups then watched the reliable adult use their head (opposed to their hands) to activate a push-on light and 61% of the babies imitated the adult's behavior. But when the unreliable group watched the unreliable adult do the same thing, only 34% of the babies gave the push-on switch a shot.

In conclusion, your reliability will be held against you. So if we want our babies, kids, or anyone to take us seriously and learn from us, we better lead by example...which really comes as no surprise.  

P.S. Today is the last day to enter the Lace and Arrows giveaway! Enter here.

November 13, 2013

Boys And Their Cars

It's frustrating to be frustrated, ask anyone. But sometimes a little irritation is exactly what we need to get things rolling. Back in the day Dylan’s sworn enemy was tummy time. He would wiggle and squirm, using all of his might to flip onto his back. The more frustrated he became the more progress he would make. I wanted so badly to turn over for him that I would lie on the ground and repeatedly roll over like a dog in an effort to show him how it's done. My tactics didn't work but his perseverance did and now days he's a roll master who has shifted his frustration to a new challenge: the toy car. 

Though he always forgets it, he hates that dang toy. At first he is enticed with its smooth mobility when I show him how it rolls on its wheels, but once he has the car to himself he remembers how evil it is. He hasn’t figured out how to make the car roll on his own, nor can he get a good grip on it. The poor kid will spend ten minutes crawling after the toy, inadvertently pushing it further away with his fingertips each time he reaches out. And when he finally does get the car in his hands, he’s sick of crawling and pissed off that it doesn’t roll steadily and tosses it aside only to begin the chase all over again. The whole cycle is frustrating but sorry son, if you wanna roll like a boss you gotta work through it. I mean- at least he’s perfected the high-speed floor crawl...right?  

P.S. There's only ONE DAY LEFT to enter my $50 Lace & Arrows credit giveaway featured here! Good luck!

November 12, 2013

Fat Baby Dream Crusher

When strangers approach me to dote on the cuteness that is Dizbaby, "how old is he?" tends to be one of the first things they ask. Their eyes widen when I tell them his age and then we both laugh at what a big boy I have. Yes, I know- he is humungo-jumbo. Though my son looks large enough to compete in a decathlon, he isn't even old enough to walk. So for weeks I have been looking forward to his 9 month check-up with his doctor where I imagined Dylan would break the scale during his weigh-in, vanquish all growth percentiles, and be hailed King by size, a reputation and title he would hold for life. 

Instead, he weighed a measly 22lbs and is only heavier than 83% of other babies his age. Sure he's still "big", but I figure if my back must suffer from lugging him around everywhere, he might as well go all the way with it and break that freaking scale. And though my dreams of having the biggest baby in the world have been crushed, I am still a proud momma. Dylan's healthy, he's happy, and most of all he is mine mine mine!

P.S. There's only TWO DAYS LEFT! Don't forget to enter my $50 Lace & Arrows credit giveaway featured here!   

November 8, 2013

Parents "Get It"

People with kids share a common understanding that it takes a lot of energy to be a parent and at times we're just plain exhausted. We can't always take breaks when we need them because somehow children have a heightened sense of relaxation and will repel it immediately upon detection. That's just the way it goes sometimes but the smiles, giggles, and joy those vitality sucking youngsters gift us somehow makes it all worth it. Yesterday night was my reward.

Dylan has been a crab for the majority of the week on account of the teething monster. He is fussy, impatient and downright needy. I've tended to him the best I can but gum discomfort is all part of the baby game and there's only so much I can do to lift his spirits and ease the suffering. So yesterday night after a frustrating and long day, my little big boy crawled onto my lap, pulled himself up to my chest and rested. Dad tried coaxing Dylan into crawling over to him but for once in his life all he wanted was mommy, and all I wanted was to preserve the moment forever. 

And though child rearing can be draining, the loving involved is insurmountable and paramount to all the work it takes to get the job done. Yup, it's totally worth it. Other parents understand.

P.S. Don't forget to enter my $50 Lace & Arrows credit giveaway featured here!  

November 6, 2013

Slap Happy

Don't kids do the darnedest things? Now that Dylan is officially 9 months old he is celebrating by using the palm of his hand to slap himself upside the head. Though I appreciate his enthusiasm, it is a bit hard to watch. "Don't be mean to my baby!" I tell him, but he doesn't care. He is determined to play knock-knock with his noggin. Dizbaby wants to play with your head too. Yesterday when I leaned in to give him a kissy he put both his hands around my face and began slapping my cheeks repeatedly. Sorry bucko but mommy doesn't play that. Okay- yes I do....because as soon as he was done clapping my face he pulled me in for a kiss and I melted. But in the future, do not slap my face kid. 

Have you ever seen a small child hit their parents in a restaurant and  then laugh about it? That's my fear. I'm constantly considering  what impact "the now" will have on the future and my hyper-paranoia and overactive imagination envisions a giant, strong toddler wheeling blows to my head then giggling as I fall to the ground all because I didn't teach him not to hit. A kid hitting their parent just because it's funny is wildly inappropriate and embarrassing even if all parties think it's a big ole joke. So you can only imagine what was going through my head yesterday when Dylan bit my butt. Oy vey.

P.S. Don't forget to enter my $50 Lace & Arrows credit giveaway featured here!  

November 5, 2013

Recruiting for Team Mommy

I have a little bit of a bone to pick with my son. Namely, he's a jerk. For whatever reason the doting, the feeding, the playing and the attention I provide is miniscule in comparison to whatever his dad does. Though I may be his loving mother who does nothing but treat him like the golden child I believe him to be, if his dad is around I am merely chopped liver that stinks up the room and he would prefer that I take a hike and let boys club commence. REALLY? 

I've always known dad was the favorite but I didn't realize just how much he was ahead in the polls until the last few days when Dylan had both of us to himself. My husband thinks Dylan's parental preference is hilarious and eats it up like Thanksgiving dinner. He will pick up Dizbaby and insist I put my hands out and say, "let's go!" And each time I do Dylan holds my husband tight and rests his head on his shoulder while giving me his back, uninterested in going anywhere with Mommy. But when the roles are reversed and I have Dylan in my arms and dad puts his hands out and utters "let's go," Dizbaby jumps at the opportunity and literally pushes off my body to lunge toward dad. Uhm...REALLY? It is quite possible that I have the meanest baby in the world, who repeatedly demonstrates that he favors dad over mom. 

The bone that I have to pick with Dylan is apparently the same bone he throws me when Dad isn't around. Because when there are no other options I am option number 1. And though I am boiling with jealousy...I will happily take Dad's sloppy seconds. Dylan might not be Team Mommy but I am definitely Team Dizbaby. 

P.S. Don't forget to enter my $50 Lace & Arrows credit giveaway featured here

November 1, 2013

Packing Up Halloween

After weeks of Halloween hype the day finally came and Dizbaby wasn't having it. By the time trick-or-treating arrived Dylan was fast asleep and uninterested in partaking in the festivities. We ended up buying two giant bags of chocolate and staying in to pass out candy, but that too was an epic fail. Despite having truckloads of kids in our neighborhood who frequently stop by to sell us cookies, wrapping paper and nuts, we didn't receive a single trick or treater. NOT ONE! I don't understand what was responsible for the mass abduction of our local children but at least I have a gazillion goodies to eat during my investigation.  

The Halloween decorations have been taken down and the jingle jangle of the holiday season is rattling in my head. So here's to our next round of firsts with Dizbaby and to the final months of 2013. I'm ready!